Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Just the Two of Us

We had our end of iteration demo and planning meeting yesterday. Exactly two people showed up: me and the other programmer. Upper management and the sales guy were all conveniently out of the office. There was no request to reschedule, no request for a remote presentation, nobody calling in, nothing. And yet, every time I see these people they continue to ask just what it is our product does, what new features we're going to have next release, and even when the release is going to be. I find it all highly motivating, as you can imagine. I guess it could be worse. They could be treating us like we're a family. A highly dysfunctional family whose meetings would go a little something like this:
Manager: Why don't you tell us what you did during the iteration today?
Sales guy: Yes, dear, how is the iteration going?
Me: Like you care. I don't have to tell you shit, you're not my real manager.
Manager: THE HELL I AIN'T! As long as I'm here putting plans on the table, I'm your manager. Your real manager left. He didn't want you. I'm all you've got, bub.
Me: Shut up! I can go and work with him whenever I want!!!
Manager: The sooner you get it through your thick head that as long as you're at my company you'll work by my rules the better off you'll be.
Sales guy: Why can't we just have a normal, quiet demo meeting like other companies!?
Manager: Why can't you be more like your co-worker? I don't hear him complaining.
Other programmer: Actually...
Manager: Oh, here we go. I always thought you were the good one. Now this bad apple has you talking like him. You two better straighten up and fly right or else.
Me: I hate you, I wish you were dead!!!
...and scene. Yeah, I guess it could actually be worse. The environment here is not very demanding. However, it's also not very productive or enriching. I think my skills are going to atrophy if I'm not careful. I think I'll just start overengineering and gold plating everything using whatever technology I feel like learning more about. It's not like anyone would know the difference or even be present to stop me.


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