Monday, April 10, 2006

Another One Rides the Bus

It's official, my manager is leaving for greener pastures. This continues the steady decline of normal people at this organization. One of the higher ups had a quick meeting to announce the departure of two people (my manager being one of them). I so look forward to being in these large meetings with all of my fellow co-workers. It's an interesting challenge, much like trying to fit my own fist in my mouth. Of course, since we're a "family" here, there's no shortage of the good natured ribbing. I'd recount some of it but I think I blacked out for a bit.

On the plus side for these morons, one of their own (the butter troll) is returning as a permanent employee. He was laid off and hired back as a contractor when the new project leader pulled some strings for him. At the news of his friend's rehire, my favorite dipshit actually threw his fist in the air and let loose a very loud "YES!" The same shitwit later cracked a joke, trying to determine if the req to hire a new person was "req" or "wreck." He was then playfully hit by a stress ball. He then had to explain to the person on the phone that he was just hit with a stress ball for his remark. I feel gayer for having witnessed it.

On the plus side for me, they're doing an early happy hour tomorrow. That means not only do I not have to put in my full 6 hour workday but that I get to drink around my co-workers. Surely that can't lead to anything inappropriate happening...

The rest of the mercifully brief meeting was spent by the moron twins trying to blow the boss' meat whistle. This started with, "Now don't do too good a job on support or they won't want to deal with anyone else. You're so good at it." Insert some additional ball cupping here, and finally finish with "I'm sorry to hear you won't be able to attend the happy hour tomorrow. If you let me know what you want, I can drink it for you." The guy the phone then had to actually respond! He wanted a frozen margarita with a little salt around the rim.

So there you have it. Tomorrow, one of the eager beavers will spend the afternoon licking the salt off his boss' rim.


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