Derek-isms 2

Here's the latest collection of statements and conversations I've heard from Derek lately.

• (sneeze sneeze) Bless you...I sure hope you're not getting sick...(expressed with "genuine" concern)


• Derek: Hey, where did you just come from?
  Other: While your detailed interest in my travel plans is always charming, let's just say I'm here and leave it at that.


• Derek: Hey, Greg. I'm done borrowing Tom's books. Did you want to borrow them before I gave them back?
  Me: No, that's alright, thanks.
  Derek: Ok. I'll just put them on his desk then.
  Me: Um, ok.
  Derek: Which desk is his?
  Me: Just put them in the cube next to me.
  Derek: Ok. Hey, his keyboard and mouse are in this other cube.
  Me: (Sigh) Yeah he was sitting over there last week because he likes the light better. I'm sure he'll find them whichever cube you put them in.
  Derek: Ok. I'll put them in the one next to you. They're right there if you want to borrow them.


• Derek: How's it going?
  Me: Oh, I can't complain.
  Derek: That's funny. I knew a guy who said that. I said, "Sure you can." He assured me that he couldn't. It was part of his job description. He actually wasn't allowed to complain.
  Me: (walking away) That's funny.


• Derek: I just heard you're leaving. Good luck at the new place.
  Me: Yeah, I'll keep my fingers crossed.
  Derek: The only problem with that is it's hard to type.
  Me: Er, yeah.
  Derek: Well, keep your chin up.
  Me: Ok.
  Derek: Otherwise, someone might sock you in such a fashion as to cause you to have to keep your chin up.
  Me: Yeah, I guess that could happen.
  Derek: I'm mainly staying here out of a sense of loyalty to my co-workers. And my immediate manager.
  Me: Oh? Well, that's good.

There are more, but you get the idea.