Friday, June 09, 2006

Derek-isms 2

Here's the latest collection of statements and conversations I've heard from Derek lately.
  • (sneeze sneeze) Bless you...I sure hope you're not getting sick...(expressed with "genuine" concern)

  • Derek: Hey, where did you just come from?
    Other: While your detailed interest in my travel plans is always charming, let's just say I'm here and leave it at that.

  • Derek: Hey, Greg. I'm done borrowing Tom's books. Did you want to borrow them before I gave them back?
    Me: No, that's alright, thanks.
    Derek: Ok. I'll just put them on his desk then.
    Me: Um, ok.
    Derek: Which desk is his?
    Me: Just put them in the cube next to me.
    Derek: Ok. Hey, his keyboard and mouse are in this other cube.
    Me: (Sigh) Yeah he was sitting over there last week because he likes the light better. I'm sure he'll find them whichever cube you put them in.
    Derek: Ok. I'll put them in the one next to you. They're right there if you want to borrow them.

  • Derek: How's it going?
    Me: Oh, I can't complain.
    Derek: That's funny. I knew a guy who said that. I said, "Sure you can." He assured me that he couldn't. It was part of his job description. He actually wasn't allowed to complain.
    Me: (walking away) That's funny.

  • Derek: I just heard you're leaving. Good luck at the new place.
    Me: Yeah, I'll keep my fingers crossed.
    Derek: The only problem with that is it's hard to type.
    Me: Er, yeah.
    Derek: Well, keep your chin up.
    Me: Ok.
    Derek: Otherwise, someone might sock you in such a fashion as to cause you to have to keep your chin up.
    Me: Yeah, I guess that could happen.
    Derek: I'm mainly staying here out of a sense of loyalty to my co-workers. And my immediate manager.
    Me: Oh? Well, that's good.
There are more, but you get the idea.


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